How to get rid of emotional attachment?

Muskan Jhanwar
4 min readSep 1, 2020


When we are attached to someone or something, we have the fear of losing the person, the relation. Some of our attachments can be good for us and some can affect us mentally, like love and appreciation for our families, and can motivate us to be our best and develop good relations with them. But, if we are careless, some emotional attachments can control our lives, altering the way we think and act. Decisions help us to think clearly and make good choices for not allowing our emotions to rule our lives. You can do this by observing yourself, accepting change, socializing, and forming healthy relationships.
Emotional attachment is a bunch of feelings created when you are very close to your partner, friends, or anyone. Do people believe that overcoming from an emotional attachment is very difficult but is it so? Here are some of the ways to overcome an emotional attachment.

  1. Understand what non-attachment means:
    Practicing non-attachment accepts that jobs, relationships, and material possessions are ultimately fleeting. They fully enjoy these gifts of life at the moment instead of wishing they would last forever. When you have clarity about something is going to end, then let it go without any regrets. When you accept that everything to go with the flow, you allow yourself to fully experience your life, riding the movement of your emotions without being held back by them.
    Learn to accept the reality of life that there are some aspects in your job or relationship which are not in your control. Keep experiences in your mind and learn out from them, observe your mistakes, and think about how you can least numbers of your mistakes.

2. Meditate daily:
Meditation asks you to focus solely on the present moment, healing yourself, thinking positively, letting go all worries, and also about the past and future. These thoughts are drawing your attention away from your focus. To work on releasing them off, find some time each day to be alone in a quiet space and take in positive vibrations and talk to god about your life. Try to meditate for at least fifteen minutes initially, but extend this time after 4 days. Focus on your breathing and your body and avoid negative thoughts which can affect mentally and physically.
You can download meditation apps like Headspace or Calm to assist.

3. Let go of expectation:
It is often our expectations that make us be disappointed with others. When someone breaks your trust, don’t allow yourself to focus on it, just learn and move on. Focus only on what is important for you and what will make you a better person.
For instance, if your friend is receiving you late for a party, don’t sweat it. Call them and tell them you’ll drive yourself or find something else to do while you wait.

4. Stay calm no matter the situation:
Another way of not attaching is to have control over emotions. When circumstances start upsetting you, this is a sign that you’re clinging to an expectation, idea, person, or thing. Take a moment to focus on your breathing. Step away from the situation so that you don’t react out of anger or sadness. Return when you feel at peace and accepting of the situation.

5. Live an ethical life:
Conduct yourself with integrity. Often, we feel attachments to things that we shouldn’t be doing at all as we have done it before with someone. Be honest with others, keep your promises, and don’t steal or hurt others. Focus on taking care of yourself.

6. Read books about non-attachment:
Step out and go to the library and find interesting books to read and expand your knowledge which will help you with the practice of non-attachment. Also, you can find books on Amazon, Flipkart. The more you keep yourself occupied into good books, the easier this process will become.

7. Stay active even when things are changing:
Perhaps you are dealing with the move of a friend who you were very close with. Though this loss will sadden you, keep yourself busy. Try out these changes in the lives of your close ones that don’t affect your own. Make a list of things to do throughout the day so and make sure they keep you occupied and doesn’t make you feel lonely.

8. Make a change to your surroundings:
Though you can’t control others, you can control yourself. Detaching yourself from something or someone you are madly attached to, need to make other changes in your life. Cut your hair or reorganize furniture. Declutter your space or get a puppy. Invest your time in making yourself better, to shift your focus on new things and better things. This will help you get used to changing as a part of life and even embrace it, which will make it easier for you to stop clinging to things and people.

9. Learn from your experience:
Every emotional attachment has a message. You may realize that the information is for you to learn to adjust to what you cannot change, to be more accepting, to learn to be more resilient, or to change something you can. See if you can step out of the emotion and observe the message which you gained out of the experience. With a little more awareness, you will benefit from the experience as you look back and find an element of growth in it.

10. Keep yourself Busy:
Don’t give yourself a chance to sit idle and brood over the situation, do the things you enjoy most. This can be done by keeping yourself busy in some work and even by socializing with friends and family members.
You can even start with a new activity that you were willing to do for long. When you engage yourself in a new activity the mishap that has to happen to you takes a back seat and you will automatically start forgetting it.